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Just a few friendly reminders from the coaches. . . .
Interference
1. Don't go into the dugout to give
instructions.
The girls have coaches, and they have worked
hard on developing cohesion and a mental attitude toward the game. Yelling out
tips, advice, correction, or criticism will in no way improve your daughter's
performance. The same principle holds true in yelling out advice from the
sidelines. Keep in mind, the content and accuracy of the information is not the
issue. Unsolicited help is criticism. If your daughter has not asked for your
advice, then don't give it.
2. Don't question the coach's decisions during or between games.
As a parent, you have a right to your opinion
regarding playing time, attitude, criticism, etc. However, we recommend the 24
hour rule - speak to the coach 24 hours after the game. By then, the dust has
settled, tempers have cooled, and cooler heads prevail. At that time, be
specific as to your concerns. Beginning at about 14 years old, we believe it is
important for you to empower your daughters, and teach them to take care of
their own needs. Rather than speak for them, encourage them to speak up for
themselves.
3. Don't make a spectacle of yourself during the game.
Loud and rude comments to umpires, opposing coaches, or even opponents may seem
humorous to you, but your daughter is cringing in the dugout with embarrassment.
We know this because we're there with them. Always keep in mind that you are
their role model, and act on the field the way you would want your child to
behave.
4. Don't tell your daughter everything she has done wrong on the ride home from
the game.
Trust me, this is not what is considered quality time and sharing. You may think
it is helpful, but she feels criticized. In addition, she already knows that the
error she made in the sixth inning that allowed the winning run to score was
not good, and does not need to be reminded of it by you.
Involvement
1. Always be positive.
Learn to encourage, not criticize. If you don't have something good to say,
don't say it.
2. Be a parent, not an agent.
Talk to your daughter regarding her concerns, and help her to learn to take care
of most issues herself. Rather that criticize coaches and players, and make
excuses for herself, take the excellent opportunity to teach her how to cope
with adversity. Don't make lists of demands for the coaches to follow.
3. Spend time practicing at home.
In the years to come, you will both treasure the memories of tossing the ball
around, much more so than of victories and losses.
4. Volunteer your time.
Ask us how you can help, and follow our direction. Your daughter will
appreciate your positive involvement, and be proud to have you as part of her
team.
5. Attend games and cheer.
As it has been stated on many occasions, we must always keep in mind that
positive self esteem is the primary goal of sports, not [just] winning or
losing.
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